The Frozen Throne

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." - Clark Gable (Gone with the Wind, 1939)

 

OK, my time here is short, so I'll make it brief.

 

I've kinda neglected this blog for about... I don't know... an ETERNITY, so to speak. Frankly, I don't know how to put it nicely, since I've had so much free time during these past few months I don't even have the foggiest idea of whatever I should do with it. I've been hooked up (read OBSESSED) with updating my deviantART profile that I'd almost forgotten about both my Friendster and YouTube accounts. Minor stuff like work (officially retired since May 2008), scholarship applications, gaming, and other miscellany got in the way, but are mostly harmless.

 

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I've found out several things:

"Know ye not that the unrighteous shall inherit the kingdom of God?..." - The Unrighteous Bible of 1653

 

Why I'm writing this at this moment I have not absolutely the faintest idea whatsover. Currently, behind me, a bunch of people are sitting behind me playing poker (or whatever forsaken card game they call it) while a few other are enjoying a Mr. Bean movie under air-conditioning after a hearty barbecued feast. Well me, I don't know... Maybe all this is some sort of quiet before the storm - tommorrow I'll be taking the annual pilgrimage from North to South along with my next of kin. After last year's haphazard vacation trip, I'd resign any invitation to make that journey. Only You know why in Your name You'd force me to sally forth unto that route once more. It's like going from one seperate dimension to another one, the latter being a much satrical and wayward parody of the former.

 

Things have been - how shall I put it? - eventful, to say the least. Apart from the unexpectedly surprising more-than-my-usual-I-can-handle-it-limit handful of social events happening in my typically uneventful life (including two seperate dinners and a miscellany of other stuff happening), everything is as normal as it should be. As the card game behind me finally draws to a close, and the players prepare to take their leave, I'd like to wonder: why did You have to make time run so quickly (all in accordance to Einstein's Theory of Relativity)? Why can't You - of ALL THINGS - for just once, make time just seem to slow down and let everything move as slowly as the temporal flow?

 

But who am I -  a mere mortal - to argue with You? I don't really deserve to voice such a selfish opinion, especially when the ineivitable is fast approaching. You need not mention it, oh great Lord, I'm prepared as to resign myself to my fate when it presents itself to me at the moment it chooses to reveal itself to me. Come what may, Thy Servant is prepared... Partially, at least...

 

And while we're on the subject, I'd like to draw to Your attention a certain cousin of mine. I understand he's a bit of a pain in the royal butt, and I don't condone it - he's quite the instigator when it comes to rallying my younger relatives against me, and he's a capable fighter. A hot-blooded fellow, with all the makings of a potential hoodlum in him. His ears fall deaf when advice and wisdom comes to him, his judgement clouded. I understand that I myself am a particularly excellent target for mockery because of my stature, but that doesn't mean that he can pick on me whenever he desires. I humbly beseech upon Thee to please open his eyes, and pray that he sees his sins before it's too late for him to turn back. Please. I beg of You.

 

May You have mercy upon me, whereever and whenever I may be.

 

 

"We've got a cheap lawyer an' we're not afraid to use him!" - Nac Mac Feegle saying (Terry Pratchett's Discworld universe)

 

Ye gawds, issit really that time of year again? The time when people wear socks on their heads instead of their feet and blue cheese turns into  cheap salad dressing for desperate homecoming queens in a fashion crisis? The time when wombats take up arms (and possibly legs) against the human race oppressing them and the sky rains burning dogs (thank Sheogorath for that, seriously)?

 

Meh, the ways of the world in its current pathetic, increasing depressing and worringily sorryful state obviously needs a bit of mending by the citizens of the free (or partially free/not free, depending on your opinion) nations of the planet. And by that, I mean A LOT.

 

But enough of worldly matters too complex to understand and facts simply too hard to digest by the mind's homunculi working 24/7 oiling the brain's nooks and crannies. Here's a little low-down on what happened the past few days, and a glimpse into my (awkwardly bleak) future...

 

 

The Beginning of the End (and Vice Versa)

Things have boiled down a bit since the beginning of the year, the end of the school year was in sight then. We were obliviously blind to its coming, busily chattering away on rather unsightly juvenile matters as it slowly crept closer with each passing day. We passed memos to each other wishing the other party well (or unwell in some cases), photos flew everywhere like migrating birds (don't ask), and in the end... Well... you know... 

And what happened next was...... I don't know...... A melting pot of emotions all thrown into the mix and came out looking like three quarters creme brulee, one fifth lobster thermidor, 31% whole-stuffed camel and the rest God-knows-what. SPM came and went, we went to places, I got a job as a part-time clerk, and got two new dogs (the last one ran away, which is basically history repeating itself, since the first one we had also ran away...... and got turned into roadkill). Apparently Santa forgotten all about me this year, but I obviously deserved it - I was a bit of an asshole this year. But then again, who needs presents to be happy?

 

 

As the last hours of 2007 slowly tick away, it became obvious to me that I should've started saying my prayers some time earlier this year. My hopes of a straight A1 record have no doubt been dashed away, but then again, you never know. The only thing predictable about life is that it's unpredictable to the end - you may see one thing coming at you at first, but a fleeting moment later, it happens not. It's this kind of unknowing (if that's even a word) that keeps you guessing, I guess. Still, I can only hope God can hear me and pray that He shows me a modicum of pity, for the sake of my future.

 

But what of the future? I've no solid plans, to say the least. As I keep saying to myself and everyone around me:

 

 

Happy New Year to all, and to all...... Well, let's just hope all your resolutions come to pass, for better or worse.

 

 

 

 

"In crossing a heath, suppose I... found a watch upon the ground... The inference, we think, is inevitable; that the watch must have had a maker." - William Paley's Natural Theology

 

Dear God...

 

I was wondering, why the heck am I here? By which I mean, why the f**k have You dumped here on THIS Earth instead of some other Earth with some alternate timeline where Alexander the Great dies at age 99 and Nero set fire to his bloodied ass instead of to Rome (accompanied by flaming minstrels playing fiddles) during an outdoor barbecue. Where China was still an empire full of eunuchs and corruption and World War 2 ended with the Soviets bombing the heck out of the good ol' U.S. of A.

 

But this is mere wishful thinking considering my fruitful imagination hasn't changed a bit since I've turned sixteen (and ten days). Such age should've brought about maturity in a young man of my stature, but considering the fact that Youth is a bastard who likes to linger in a person and is so stubborn you have to get a dozen Chinooks to move it out of the way, I'm still pretty much still the way I am before as I'm now. Call it madness, if You must, but the sincere fact is that You are my Creator, after all; but if there's anything You can do to make me a tad bit normal to fit in better amongst my peers, that would be very, VERY helpful.

 

If I can make a statement here, why is the world in generally so damn f**ked up right now? If You haven't really noticed, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse have apparently snuck in unnoticed by Your All-Seeing Eyes and are now revelling and lavishing in the chaos that is present in about 99.99% of the globe. I think You must've misplaced that little agenda somewhere in Your memo, seeing that You're always such a busy person running the world. Might I suggest You start by have terrorists kidnap Da Presidant of Da Unitad Statez off Amerika and then have said terrorists kill Bush on international television and then send those videos straight to YouTube to be made available for viewing later on. Then have Islamic militants overrun the White House and declare Osama bin Laden (wherever he is right now) Supreme Overlord of the Universe. (O.o!!!) Like I said, all this is but wishful thinking. And I blame YOU (actually the Devils down in Hell) for twisting and playing with my mind like so it more or less resembles the proverbial primordial soup of old (mid-Jurassic currently).

 

It comes as no surprise that You have fated me to take this road as to allow me to ascend to my Manhood. But the trivialities that face me beginning 19th of June up till now have - IMHO - as I believe to be plagues mistakenly sent by You when they should've been blessings. Albeit one minor saving grace (the so-called Sport Prefects sent me off to the Quarter-Marathon of the annual Penang Bridge Run instead of the Half they intended me for, and I got a medal for it), everything went off horribly wrong (if You could, kindly change the mind of the barmy old codgers at the ABRSM in London or somewhere and change the marks on my Grade 7 Practical test, thanks ;p). Heck, I've got excellent reason to believe that even Jesus (or Moses, for that matter) doesn't even have a clue as to what You're doing up there (playing Halo 3, I suppose?).

 

Whatever is the case, I'm only human after all. And compared to You, I'm only a tiny flea in the midst of billions of others. Or ants. Or bees. Or hornets. Or tiny spiders. (I'm referring to this because I was quite distracted by all the activity going on in the flowerbeds of near the school steps where the brass band was practicing involving all invetebrates mentioned above except the fleas) Anyhow, I've got to get going... Got stuff to do, people to mock, and tests to fail... Or something of the sort.

 

 

Thy Unyielding Believer in Thy Utmost Holy Faith,

"Hell, it's about time." - Tychus Findlay (StarCraft II)

 

For those of you who are still wandering around in some Nydus Canal (for non-SCers, it's a sort of a worm-like tube the bug-like Zerg use to transport their minions of DHOOOOM!!!! around the battlefield) admiring and/or poking it's innards (you bastards), the boys at Blizzard have already started working on the sequel to their space fantasy RTS which promises to be a thousand times more worth playing than the original (except in South Korea, the nerds). I'm already started to wonder how many fans have already stocked up on Gatorade and Hot Pockets already waiting for the moment the game comes out...

 

So anyways, the second half of the year began without much pomp and ceremony, preferably the way I wanted it to be. Nothing much has happened really except the installation of a THIRD desktop in the living room with a 1400*800 Dell LCD monitor which was my Dad's Father's Day gift (hell, we're running out of space here). It's a shocker, but hey, I'm typing on the damn thing right now. My school grades were mediocre to say the least, but given my performance in the Grade 7 practical, I'd say I'd need 12 years before I can finally consider myself ready to join the humble ranks of the citizen workforce.

 

But these are but minor details. My life is still going to go on as usual, and please tell nobody that anything special will happen on Wednesday. I prefer to keep things under wraps. You may ask if you will, but I won't be telling.

 

I'm having a sore throat (true, taking medications as we speak) and elephants in my stomach (or was it just that I was hungry?) just thinking about the 20th...

 

Jesus, save me.

 

Starved Past To Death,